"Senior Superlatives" by Cabrini Class of 1984
- B Patrick Jensen
- 3 minutes ago
- 8 min read
Digging for Compliments
I was digging through memories that I have not reviewed in decades. Oh yes, I retain some things from the old days that I fancy as worthy of keeping-- still very much in hard copy. Many folks have their memorabilia in digital nowadays. An aggregation from years of interacting in their favorite social networks. But I am a baby boomer, turning sixty five this year. Back in the day that I was still using a typewriter, to write articles for the college newspaper for example. I have dig through dusty things to pull up memories .
My treasure chest is an Army footlocker passed down by my Dad, acquired during the Korean conflict. Dad did a short stint in the Army stationed in San Antonia, Texas. His big war story is mention that he visited the Alamo. I only have a few of inherited things, the most valuable is my dad's wedding ring, with his and my mom's initials date off marriage 11/8/58 inscribed. The footlocker is itself another that I cherish. Can't put those online.
Then the standard items we typically stash are piled about-- hallmark cards, old photos, yearbooks, etc. And that brings the Education Archive. I have my diplomas and tassels from grade school through my Graduate program are in there. A lot of school stuff. I was digging for compliments.
Personal Place to Learn
The most voluminous of the dusty stacks is from Cabrini College Class of 1984. Later upgraded to Cabrini University and recently downgraded no Cabrini at all. The school has been shuttered.
Back in my day it was "The Personal Place to Learn". Indeed, that's how was for me. It was an eventful stint. I not only attended, later I was Lecturer there for ten years teaching a night class. The humble Catholic marketing hype was authentic. Lot's of stories, many, many, many memories. But I forgot about this one:
I was looking at my trophies of paperwork that declared me a man worthy of recognition. Certificate of Achievement memorialized in typewriter, plaques for winning an essay contest. I forgot about that one. But did remember I won $100. Big money in 1984.
My digging brought back many a memory of those precious days.
Giving Thanks with Family
On Thanksgiving Day, home on break my Freshman Year, I told my parents I had some news: They braced themselves. Was I was kicked out already.? "Jesus Christ, what is it now Bri?" My dad prayed quite a bit to the good Lord and he hardly went to church at all. One of his favorites was "Jesus, Mary and Saint Joseph!" We were Catholic. So he knew the main players.
I told my family that I was elected Class President. My parents stared at each other from across the dining room table. My mom dropped her fork; my dad took a swig of Kiafi, his Danish wine he drank only on Thanksgiving and Christmas. It tastes like cough syrup. It cleared any chance of choking on a turkey morsal. I told them I was elected Homecoming King too, and I didn't even know what the heck that was in High School. And, I explained, that's why I ran for class president. My sister Eileen ("Bean"), who would attend Cabrini too, began to laugh. "No you didn't" she scoffed in giggle.
My father was open to the possibility at least. But he wanted more data. "What does a Class President do?" "I don't know," I replied. "I have a meeting about it when I go back to school." That's when my dad believed me. "Jesus Christ Bri." He was praying for my success.
Graduation 1984
Fast forward to my day of graduation in May, 1984. I spoke at Graduation Mass' It was the "Meditation" a thing that Catholics sometimes do with a guest speaker to livin up those special holy events that occur from time to time. By that time, my parents believed me.
I was told, that as I spoke, trying to sound like John F. Kennedy as best I could, that my father, not known as sentimental type, stared teary-eyed whispering "Look at him, look him, look him Peg (my Mom).". He kept saying it. My mom said, "Yes, I see him." It was a television moment. At least fodder for PBS After School Special .
Catholic Sin and Redemption Scale
My parents were good folks. And I sometimes, not alway, made that hard for them in my boyhood years, and a few aduult year too. My pasion went both ways on the Catholic Sin and Redemption Scale (that's CSRS - I made it up). My track record is checkered. But I was Redeemed that day. Looking back at the many magical moments I have been blessed to experience across my aging existence, that is a topper.
It was special because my parents would be gone and missed all the other biggies. My mom passed away less than two years later. I dedicated my Masters thesis to my father who was struggling at the time dealing with my mom's shocking loss. Then, less than three months before I was married, my father also passed away. He gave me his wedding band before he died so I could wear it as mine. It's in his footlocker.
Brief Shining Moment
I could easily lament that my parents did not see my career take off, my glorious wedding, my beautiful little girls, the grand home and neighborhood where they grew up and prospered. I made every Christmas at our house an over-the-top thing, like my Mom did for me and my siblings every year. And my kids were Jewish.! My mom was great at the joy thing. Very charismatic. That's where I got it from.
I traveled the world, made big bucks and did a lot of cool things that would have blown them away. But there is no void about it. I credit Cabrini for that one brief shining moment. No high matches that one. And I've tried them all!
So Cabrini College (not University) holds a special place. It did for my sister "Bean" too. Another huge slice of gratitude that she attended there with me. I have been so very blessed.
Self Awareness
And just in the moment of digging through my treasured Cabrini paraphernalia my nostalgic took a turn for a deeper reflection and tiny jolt of self awareness, which I tend to need from time to time. My parents spent years trying to make me more self aware. I wouldn't bite! But once again Cabrini College came to rescue!
I came upon a bunch of Achievement Certificates underneath my Cabrini diploma and awards I boast. They are called "Senior Superlatives". Certificates of recognition awarded by Classmates who vote for the most worthy and deserving of their peers. I forgot all about this testimony.
Accomplished
I was quite accomplished. There were nine of the of these called "Certificate of Award". First of all , I was a Communications major, and that term is redundant. A "certificate" is a physical piece of paper that serves as proof, and an "award" is a prize or honor. I saw no cash, no prize. And honor? So you have to question the legitamcy of these things right of the bat. Here are the collective judgments and award recognitions bestowed on me by my college peers in 1984:
Most Dedicated
All-American Boy
Rowdiest
Funniest Laugh
Most Talkative
Biggest BS’er
Biggest Brown-Noser
Most Distinguished Walk
Most Likely to Be Late for Graduation
I was beaming with pride about the Dedication thing, but it obviously deteriorated as I went down the list. At first glance, it reads less like an awards ceremony and more like a psychological profile conducted by people who had grown tired of listening to me. WTF? They seemed attentive at the graduation mass.
I was apparently patriotic, loud, walked funny, talked too much, exaggerated stories, laughed too loudly, kissed up to authority figures, showed remarkable dedication to everything, and somehow still couldn’t arrive on time for graduation. It’s a fascinating combination.
BS and Brownie - A Case Study
I question the Categories. Biggest BSer AND Brown-noser are definitely overlapping categories. If I’m bullshitting with , say, Doctor Jerome Zurek, from Cabrini-- he is a player by the way, Teacher of the Year in all of Pennsylvania, and a great instructor and Chairman of the award winning Communications Department, and a wonderful human being who has helped all kinds of folks, changed my life, and who I still see his mug in the do-gooder news , supporting every social cause that matters to the human race. Dr. Zurek will not need Saint Peter to open the Pearly Gates for him when his time comes. He's gonna fly right in. with those Angel Wings. Bullshiting with or about Dr. Zurek would, perhaps, be a brown nose situation. But that's a sub-category. Everything else is just pure bullshit.
And “Most Talkative” paired with “Biggest Brown-noser” suggests I may have spent four years enthusiastically explaining my ideas to that saintly man whether he gave a shit or not. I thought he liked hearing my crap.
Then there is my personal favorite: “Most Likely to Be Late for Graduation.” Think about the level of commitment required for your classmates to vote for you most likely to be late for the one event where everyone knows exactly when and where they are supposed to show up. That isn’t absent-mindedness. That’s a reputation. Y'all said I was dedicated. What the hell happened to that?
And I really want to know who thinks I walk funny because that pisses me off.
I should consider it a compliment I guess. I see affection. Nobody votes for a person in that many categories unless they’ve made an impression.
The Truth in 360 Feedback
I needed redemption. You know part of my background is in career counseling and workplace talent building. Dr . Zurek hired me to teach it at Cabrini. He is awesome, did I say? So I am a longtime practitioner of 360-degree feedback. I told you Self-Awareness is thing for me. That's exactly what Senior Superlatives are-- Feedback for my personal development.
A person usually only needs one, maybe two awards to get the gist of where they stand. But my college peers were keen to pile on the education.
So I did an analysis.
All-American Boy | Likable, visible, socially engaged, trusted |
Rowdiest | High energy, risk-taking, outgoing |
Most Distinguished Walk | Presence. People noticed you enter a room. |
Biggest BS'er | Storyteller, persuasive, embellishes for effect |
Most Dedicated | Strong work ethic and commitment |
Most Talkative | Communicator, networker, influencer |
Biggest Brownie | Ambitious, relationship-builder, seeks approval |
So thank you my friends at Cabrini. This new data is going on my resume.
My next speech is gonna be about your kind education and truth telling after all these years. It is heartwarming still to have the reinforcement of peers that I remain the man of promise and talent that I always imagined myself to be.
My Parents would be proud! In fact, they were. And I am very proud of them too. And my sister Bean. And all of you who kindly offered me the truth. It was a Road Less Traveled. And that has made all the difference.
Thanks for letting me share.
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